Crazy Kenny’s Closeout Corall
Via Daniel Hearn:
Merchandise was flying out the door this weekend at the Past Champions Iceboat Shop. A special invitation was needed from Crazy Kenny himself to gain access to the Closeout Coral, which is hidden behind a secret doorway cleverly disguised with hanging drop cloths. Once inside, new Michigan-based ice sailor, Tim Bellard remarked, “With all this red and white everywhere, I kept looking for the fat man in the velour suit. He never showed, but Christmas definitely came early.” Bellard took off with a 24 foot Sitka Spruce Skeeter wing mast that he purchased for a buddy who had an “unfortunate incident” last year. And Crazy Kenny even threw a sail into the deal and free delivery to the top of Tim’s trailer. Several other unsavory characters from the 4LIYC were around the shop witnessing the selling frenzy, but none was willing to publicly comment. “Maybe if we just stand here next to Kenny acting like nothing is going on, then no one will ask any questions,” suggested Sage PK. Due to their resounding silence, they must have all agreed.

Not to be outdone, Wonky Donny’s Discount Emporium across town was also dealing. He was all out of 10-speed bikes to entice Bellard to close a deal, but he was still able to send him out the door with a classic 4LIYC, red and white Renegade. Rumor has it that said Renegade was also loaded on the 12 ft. utility trailer, including mast and plank, directly adjacent to the Skeeter mast. Fearing that his insurance provider might yank his liability policy, Bellard requested that no pictures be taken of the impressively loaded vehicle. As yet, there have been no reports of flying ice boats on the east bound corridor of I-94, so all equipment must now be safely in their new home somewhere in the hand.